


Best Friends

by JesseX3



Category: Original Work
Genre: Depression, Gen, I suck at tagging, It doesn't actually happen, Lots of time skips, Zachary is way to happy, based in real life, but it's cute, i really hope no one in this story finds and reads this, not a fairy tail ending, set in 2013, suggested rape, that wouldn't be good, unsatisfying ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-02-28
Packaged: 2018-05-23 16:15:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6122164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JesseX3/pseuds/JesseX3





	Best Friends

I drove by today, couldn't bring myself to stop though. It’s like I can't admit it even though I know all about it. You were my corner stone, my foundation, my everything. What am I supposed to do now? I go to school and no one talks to me, they still think I did it. How stupid is that! I was mad at you but there’s no way I would ever hurt you. I loved you, I still do.

That place you’re buried in is so cold even in the summer it's cold as ice. Is it me or is it cold in here too? I can't believe I let you go ALONE, I am so stupid. Although I would be dead too if I had went but at least we could keep each other company till the rest of our families come to meet us. I know I sound stupid but what else can I say? Everyone at school thinks I’m a murderer, my parents think I’m depressed -which isn't entirely wrong but I’m always a little depressed so whatever to that-, and my closest friend is dead. I’m so totally lost I have no clue what to do, or say, or think.

I used to hate hearing you give me pointless advice because I knew you had no clue what you were talking about, but now all I want is to hear you say something, ANYTHING!

I’m such an idea, a stupid, worthless, semi-depressed IDIOT!!!!!!

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s cold, dark, and lonely, here in my own room, can you believe it? Two months today. It’s never warm anymore, and the three heaters don't seem to be helping. I think I’m going insane too, I keep seeing you at school, like this morning I walked in and I thought I saw you standing by the water fountain. Then again at lunch, I really thought you were sitting right beside me, but when I look directly at your chair, and you weren’t there. Yeah, I’m going insane.

Although I suppose the other kids are starting to forget that I’m a "murderer", because that kid Zachary started to talk to me. Wait, never mind he's new. Today was his first day, although I really don't know if he knows about me or not, but he was talking to me so I don't really care. I’ll just ignore him if the others tell him they’re lies. I doubt it would be hard to ignore him, I mean I’ve been ignoring people for two months now.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hey, what's up?"

Why is he talking to me, "What?" Oh, it's that guy again. What on earth does he want?

"What's up?"

"Nothing, I guess. Now please leave me alone."

"You like being alone, don't you?"

"Not really." Why'd I say that, now he'll never leave.

"Then why do you want me to leave? You don't like me?"

Why does he sound hurt? He doesn’t even know me, "I don't know you, that's all."

"Of course you don't, but that's why I’m talking to you, so we can get to know each other."

Weirdo.

"And I figured since you don't have a friend anymore I figured I’d be your friend, since Ka-"

Evil mood activated, "How do you know her name?" Just walk away!

"Sorry I didn't mean to say it."

"It? Did you just call her an IT?" silence, "Get away from me you stupid, good-for-nothing prick!"

"Hey, I’m-"

"Shut it!" Walking away now.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One whole day and no weirdo yet.

And I spoke to soon, or think too soon, whatever.

"Hey, I’m really sorry about yesterday, I’d like to make it up to you."

"Why are you talking so fast?" No it’s supposed to be ‘why are you talking to me’ *rolling eyes at myself* this boy is getting on my nerves, what few I have left anyway.

"I didn't want to give you time to interrupt me." Staring at him like he's stupid (because he is) "That sounded strange didn't it? Sorry."

"Stop apologizing, and there's nothing you can do to make it up to me, just forget it. And if you don't want it to happen again then doesn’t talk to me."

"But then what would I do all day?" Like I care.

"I don't know find a girlfriend,” Why does he look joyful, "NOT ME!" It's gone, good. Weirdo.

"But I like you." Stare "Come out wrong again."

You think.

"Look if you just give me a chance I’ll leave you alone."

"I’ve heard that before, and it got my best friend KILLED."

Oh schist, that was loud, "Yeah, and you did the killing!" Great.

"Hey shut up, Jason!"

"You had to say that didn't you?" Stay out of it stupid.

"What, I can't defend my friend?"

"No you can't." And you’re not my friend.

"Why not?"

"Because now I owe you." And I hate owing people.

"Good, you’re going with me tomorrow after school."

"Excuse me?" What did this thing just say to me?

"You can pay me back for defending you, and I’ll win you over at the same time. I won't keep you forever."

"You have got to work on your wording."

"Yeah I know. I’ll work on it."

"Fine." One hour and I’m running.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This is stupid. The bus has left so I can't go home, and this THING has not shown up yet, maybe I should walk.

And once again I make my decision to late, there he is.

"Hey sorry I’m late. Mrs. Wilkins had me working on- where are you going?"

"I don't know."

"Well my car's over there." You have got to be kidding me.

"That?" An old BMW?

"No, that one." Even worse, a new BMW.

"Figures."

"What I can't have a nice care?"

"What year is that thing?"

"Brand new, got it last month for my birthday." Gag me, please, "Come on, you'll love where we're going."

"Where are we joyously going, anyway?" I say while being ultra-sarcastic and looking ultra-bored.

"You’ll see." He thinks he's going to surprise me, the most not caring person on earth?

"Really?"

"Yeah, why you don't like surprises?" I use too.

"Not for a while." Oh yeah, say something that makes him wonder so you can go off again and owe him a second time. You stupid child.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
(his POV)

"Oh." Crud, I really need to stop saying stuff like that! I’ve finally got her to come with me I can't afford to mess up now.

"You’re really not going to tell me?"

"Nope, you'll just have to wait till we get there." If I can make it there without ruining everything. She’s so beautiful, but she has no clue. I bet that's why she only had one friend. I  
bet Kayla knew exactly how to cheer her up too. If only she was still here. "Hop in."

"I don't 'hop'." We'll see about that-maybe.

"Ok then, get in." Crud, I sound like a brother.

 

"You’re taking me to the grocery store?"

"No." Why would she think that?

"That’s the only thing in this part of town."

"True." But we aren't staying in town.

 

She put up a fight sort of, but she's asleep now. She has no clue where I’m taking her. This would usually be bad, but from what I was told she had the most fun in two places, the beach, and the woods. She had gone to the beach with Kayla, so I’m not going there. But my dad's tree hugging ways are coming in handy right about now. Since he owns like five hundred acers of forest. I can take her anywhere in the forest, she'll be in a place she should love, while being completely safe, and the bonus, she has to stay with me the whole time or she’ll get lost. Another thing I found out, she hates being lost. Although, I have no clue how to tell if she feels lost or not, I can barely read her at all.

Come to think of it, she looks nothing like the pictures that are on the walls at school. Her team winning game after game, she and Kayla always side by side. She looked so alive, active yet peaceful, smiling all the time, bright, they even said she knew everything that happened even when she wasn't around. They tried planning parties for her, and she’d turn them into giant pranks. There’s still dried slime on the cafeteria ceiling.

Now, she looked tired, sunken, her skin a greyish color, her eyes black instead of chocolate, her hair greasy and slick, they said it used to be fluffy with perfect curls that the other girls hated because they couldn't get their hair to look even close to hers. She looks like a shadow, sitting there, blending into the dark leather of the car. I can't let her stay like this; I want her to be alive again.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh, man I fell asleep. I was NOT supposed to do that. Wait a minute, "Where are we?"

"Good morning sunshine, or should I say good evening?" What did he just call me?

"I’ll ask again. Where are we?" Because it looks like the mountains, high in the mountains, and it kind of feels like he's kidnapping me, although that would be pointless.

"We are in the forest about ten miles from town." WHAT?!?! Hide emotion...

"Excuse me? You dragged me to the forest?!?"

"Yeah, it's quiet, peaceful, and all natural."

"Dude, again work on your wording."

"What?"

"'all natural' what are you an extreme tree hugger?" Schist, no talking about trees!

"Not exactly, what you don't like the forest?" Forest, not trees. I can deal with this.

"Well, yeah. I’m just wondering why you brought me out here." In the middle of the forest with thousands of...roots under me...buried...in the ground...like...like thousands of tiny...graves.

"Wow, don't cry. What’s wrong?" I cannot break down right now!

"I’m fine." Definite crack in the voice.

"Come here," Ahhh he's hugging me! "I’m sorry, I’m sorry."

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
(his POV)

I have no clue what I’m sorry for! What just happened? I have obviously missed something, that would have been really helpful, but what?

"No, you shouldn't be sorry. It’s my fault. I just... really need to get out of here," She's still crying, she looks so broken. What have I done?

"Okay, I’ll take you home." I am a complete moron! And I don't even know why.

"Thank you."

"So how'd it go?"

"That is the stupidest question I have even heard." In the entire world!

"Dude, chill."

"T.J., she's not even here, what does that tell you?"

"That she over slept. She does it all the time; she'll show up in an hour, finish her work and ask to go home at lunch."

"If you haven’t noticed, it is lunch."

"Really?"

"You’re such an idiot."

"Whatever, spill it, what happened, where'd you take her?"

"I did some background like you said, so I figured since she 'loved the woods' and all-"

"Wow, you did not take her to the woods did you?"

"Yeah, and she was fine at first, but then...I have no clue what happened."

"Dude! What’s her nickname?"

"She has liked ten."

"On her team?"

"Treetops, why?" Why is his mouth open like I’m the stupid one?

"Get up. I’m goin' show you somethin'."

 

"Why are we at the trophy board?"

"This is why. Look at this picture of the team."

"There all turned so you can see their names."

"Read them." What, why would I-

"Holy crud!" Kayla was TreeROOTS!

"You took her to the one place she couldn’t escape the memories, the woods!"

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I haven’t gone back to school yet. I really don't want to either. I broke down, in the middle of nowhere, in front of the only person that even says anything to me. I feel like a total girl. Yeah yeah yeah I know, I am a girl, but I don't like feeling this way. It’s the one thing I swore I would never do, hid from someone. I bet he thinks I’m pathetic, not that it really matters, but now I have to go back to that place and face the mob of all the people he's told. I kind of wish I knew him a little more. So I can think of all the people he would tell and then I could ignore them but I don't know who he told, I’m sure he's told someone.

In my three day absence I’m sure the whole school knows. I’m so stupid, why did I still follow those rules?

That’s a stupid question, I know exactly why, because those rules are all that's left of HER. The rest of her family moved away, and took all her things, all I have now are a few photos(that I can't stand to look at), and those rules, the unspoken rules we made to insure we didn't owe anyone anything, and to make sure we didn't make rash, retarded decisions that would ruin our lives.

The only reason she’s gone is because I didn't follow one of those rules: Never let your friend go off alone.

So here I am, Thursday night, 12 a.m. and sleep eludes me, once again, as I stare outside into the dark, watching the owls fly by, and wishing things were different, just like last night, and every night since I broke that rule, it's all my fault.

 

Friday morning, why didn't I stay home again? Everyone is staring, again. It reminds me of the week after the funeral; everything was quiet - like now- everyone thinking I did it. I wonder if they know it doesn't bother me anymore? Of course not, they all used to 'know' me, total roll eyes moment. Like they ever knew me. They only hung around because I  
was one of the best players on the team.

I wonder what they'd do if I told them I knew them better than they know themselves?

It’s just a thought, a very amusing thought but still.

Oh will you listen to that? The bell. I’m so not going to class yet.

And of course I’m the only one that notices.

Here comes Mrs. Amanda, "What are you all staring at? Get your behinds to class, NOW!"

Suppressing an inner sigh, I love her sometimes, "Hi Mrs. Amanda."

"Hello dear, are you feeling any better?" WHAT?!?

"What do you mean?" Does the whole school really know?

"Well, Zachary told me you had gotten' sick earlier this week."

"Oh." Did he now?

"Yes, so I told your teachers to keep your work for you. It’s in the office."

"Oh, umm... thank you."

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Are you smoking?" There he is!

"Why did you cover for me?" Because I didn’t expect you too.

"Answer my question."

"Answer my question and I’ll answer yours." Not that your question matters.

"Someone spread the word I took you somewhere and they were asking, so I told them you got sick. Now answer my question."

"Does this look or smell like a cigarette?" Because there no way in Hades I would smoke.

"It looks like one, but it doesn't smell like one." Another perfect *roll eyes* moment.

"Answer my question."

"I did."

"No you told me what you did, not why. I want to know, WHY you covered for me."

"Because I didn't want you to think that I’m like that, because I’m not, and I really didn't want you to hate me."

"Rule 6: Never say hate." (Few exceptions apply)

"What?"

"Rule 6: Never say-" Holy schist, did I really just say that, "Nothing." LEAVING! Whoa! There’s an arm there!

"Wait a second, 'Rule 6'?" Oh no you didn't!

"Don't you ever say that again." Trying to chill, trying to chill. Rule 8: Always be calm.

Man, his eyes are pretty! Rule 14: Notice details. He’s still looking at me, and holding my arm.

"How many are there?"

"A few, I have to go." Before I start saying things I can't take back. Rule 11: Think before you say.

"Look at me," I’m looking. It's not like I can NOT look, "meet me tomorrow, at the theater downtown, please?"

"If you let me go." Freedom. Now my arm's cold. Wait, what?

"Meet me?"

"Time?"

"Noon."

"I dislike waiting." Walking away.

"Hey, what is that?"

"It's called a candy stick."

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why on earth was I all of a sudden spouting Rules yesterday? Why am I walking around downtown? Why am I actually thinking about going to meet him? Why am I asking myself? I don't know. Maybe I shouldn't go. I should just go to the dress store, see if I can find a nice dress that I’ll never wear, yeah I think I’ll do that.

And once again, I can't seem to get my feet to go anywhere but the theater. I’ve passed it like ten times, okay that's not true but I have passed it a few times, and to me that's a lot. I guess I should go in, should I? I’m asking myself dumb questions again, great. I’m going in.

Gross, it stinks in here.

"Hey, you came!" yeah yeah yeah.

"Why does it smell in here?"

"Oh, Caleb set off a stink bomb; actually I think it'd be best if we left, the cops will be here soon."

"What, you idiot, I am not going to jail because of your stupid friend."

"He didn't mean to, come on." Why is he laughing? It smells!

 

"So where do you want to go?"

"You’re asking me?" Schist, I thought I finally got it through peoples’ head not to ask me that kind of stuff.

"Well you’re my guest, so yeah."

"Ok since I’m your 'guest' you have to answer my questions." Maybe I can figure out how to get rid of you.

"Questions hu? Ok, how 'bout we play twenty questions?"

"Done, why won't you leave me alone?" He gagged, that's slightly funny to me.

"I thought you'd have figured it out by now, I like you. What's your favorite color?"

"It changes, black and blue mostly. And I know you like me but I don't think that's it, I’ve known guys that just like me, but they always gave up after a while, but you just keep  
coming back, why?"

"Maybe my ‘while’ isn't up yet. What’s your favorite thing to do?"

"Die. And you didn't answer my question properly."

"Fine," We've stop walking, "I’ve heard how you were before, and I want to see you that way again, because I really think that it's killing you to be the way you are now. And I just want to help."

"I suppose it is killing me in some way, but I’m this way because I don’t think I can stand to go back to the things I used to do, be who I was without..."

"I understand, that's why I’m trying to get to know you better, so I can help."

"I never asked for help, Zachary."

"I know, but you can't tell me you don't need it."

"Believe me, I don't need it, but I suppose it can't hurt."

"Then you'll try?"

"Keep this up and I might not have to." Man his smile is pretty.

"Die?"

"You still have a few things to learn. ‘Die’ to me, in that context, means to lay still and do nothing, not even think. Why are we not walking?"

"Because we stopped," Walking again, "What kind of coffee do you like?"

"Don’t like coffee. Why did you take me to the woods?"

"I asked around and I found out that you liked the beach and the woods, I know you had gone to the beach with…your friends, so I thought why not the woods. How can you not like coffee?"

"I used to like it but I don't anymore, not sure why. The woods really? Were you not thinking at all?"

"No, apparently that's the last thing I did. What’s your favorite food?"

"Also changes, most of the time its lasagna, few other times its cheese and shells. Where are we going?"

"I have no clue. When do you have to be home?"

"Monday. Who told you all that stuff about me?"

"Mostly Sarah and Shelby. Why?"

"Curious. What time is it?"

"Little after one. You’re shaking, what's wrong?"

"It’s Saturday; the girls usually hang around here about this time."

"So?"

"I do everything in my power to avoid them, ever since I stepped down from the team, they like to bug me. I guess you would say they're my bullies."

"What? Why would they do that?"

"Because I was one of the best players and they suck. They tried for years to get me hurt or kicked off the team so they could take my place. When I willingly stepped down, it  
made them mad. They wanted to see me fall, not walk away."

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Why do girls always have really stupid drama?"

"I assure you I did not start it, I try not to start any kind of drama; it's just something else to be annoyed by in the end." And it's also Rule 10: Drama is Evil (never try to start it).

"So the entire team hates you?"

"Not the whole team, just the three head girls, the rest of the team doesn’t like them but they don't care, they're in charge for the time being, and they don't care what happens, as long as they don't feel challenged they'll leave the rest of the team alone, but they can't seem to ever forget me. Why are you staring at me?" It's weird, even for you.

"I don't think I’ve ever heard you talk so much at one time." You’re such a guy.

"Okay, well if you don't mind I’d like to get off the street for a while, at least till I know they aren’t around."

"Why don't you just confront them?"

"Because if I do that they'll think I want my place back."

"And you don't? What your place back I mean."

"Yes and no. I want it back, but I don't think I would be any good for the team, if I’m distracted all the time, and I know I would be." excruciatingly distracted silent sigh.

"Come on, we'll chill in here a while." An ice cream shop, a little cliché but nice.

"Okay." It'd be even nicer if I had something called money.

"What do you want?"

"Hu…?"

"I’m not going to bring a girl to an ice cream shop and not buy her something. So, what do you want?"

"You’re serious?"

"Of course I am. Don’t make me order something random for you." Like that would go over well. Way to many perfect roll eyes moments lately, I haven’t even thought of rolling my  
eyes in over two months.

"Double fudge, one scoop, in a cup."

"Done." Now what will he get? I’m thinking he'll either get the same as me, or something really crazy like peanut butter and cake swirl or something like that. But for the moment  
I’m sitting down, with my back to the door, in the very back of this tiny, yet beautiful shop. It reminds me of when I got stuck in the rain down at the bakery for some reason.

"Here you are, my dear." FUDGE!!!! Wait what?

"Dear?" Really...

"What you don't-" What is he staring at?

"If it isn't Miss I’m-to-good-for-the-team! I thought you finally came to your since and stayed home." I know that voice.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Leave her alone, Shannon."

"Now why would I do that? She’s nothing but a sad stupid little twit."

"Shannon-"

"Why are you even here, Zachary? You do know she killed Kayla don't you? I mean, I did tell you on the first day of school, and besides, who would want to be seen with this...thing?" Killing is not good, killing is not right. Rule 12: Killing is not permitted. No matter how badly I want her dead right now, "I see she's not talking, that's alright I can talk for the both of us. Don’t you want to buy me something, Zachy?"

"His name is Zachary." Not Zachy.

"Oh, I’m sorry, did the murderer say something?" By the look in his eyes I can tell he's concerned, but I can't sit here and do nothing anymore.

"I did say something. In fact, I’m going to do something as well," This is going to be GREAT, "Shannon, you want something, and I’m going to give you something, since you didn't say what you wanted I’ll give you this." One gigantic double fudge stain all over your perfectly pressed white shirt. This I have to smile at.

"Oh my gosh, you little witch!!!!" Isn't it wonderful when their voice goes up a few octaves.

"If I’m a witch, then you’re a saint. Come on Zachary, I think I could use a walk."

 

"That was amazing."

"It felt amazing."

"And you were smiling the whole time."

"I know, and it didn't hurt as much as it did before."

"That’s good. So what are you going to do now?"

"What do you mean?"

"You just creamed the team captain; you think she'll just forget it?"

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that. I guess I’ll just cream her again if she messes with me." Which she most defiantly will.

"Alright, I’ll bring the double fudge."

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wow, life is so weird sometimes. For instance it's Saturday. And no one at school tried to 'cream' me all week. I was so certain something would have happened by now. Maybe Shannon is trying to think of a good come-back; after all I did end up ruining her favorite shirt. I heard the girls talking about it. Although apparently she didn't tell them I did it, because they didn't say anything about me or anything remotely close to me. Whatever, if she's really taking this long to think it through, then maybe it'll take me more than ten millisecond to figure it out. That girl is terrible about that kind of stuff. Oh look a new text.

 

Zachary- Hey, wrud?

Me- What do u think?

Z- nothing as always.

Me- Almost, I was thinking about Shannon.

Z- O, did something happen?

Me- No, I was just wondering why she hasn't done anything yet.

Z- maybe she's scared.

Me- I doubt that. She’s too dumb to be scared, and besides she knows I’m still- you know.

Z- u don't have 2 b.

Me- I no u want me to change, but I can't just flip a switch and everything be the way it was.

Z- I no, but u can still stand up 2 her. U did it the other day, y not again?

Me- Maybe

Z- is that a yes?

Me- It's an 'I’ll try', but you have to be with me.

Z- done, I’ll always b here.

Me- Thanks. So what did you want?

Z- I don't always have 2 want something u no.

Me- But you always want something when you text first.

Z- I have 2, u never text 1st.

Me- That's beside the point. What is it?

Z- It is not beside the point, it is the point.

Me- Are you goin’ to tell me or not?

Z- alright well. U no the cabin on that lake in Florida?

Me- You mean the one all the rich kids go to?

Z- ya that 1.

Me- yeah I know it. Why?

Z- well, about a month ago my dad bought the land, and he wants me 2 check it out.

Me- So?

Z- I’m planning on goin sometime soon. Would u go with me?

Me- Aww... Are you afraid the lake monster is going to eat you?

Z- NO!!!!

Me- Are you trying to get me to go because you like me?

Z- partly, but I really just don't want 2 go alone, and the lake is post 2 b beautiful.

Me- Beautiful hu?

Z- ya, and who knows maybe it'll help 4 u 2 get away.

Me- When?

Z- we have next Monday off of school. We could leave Friday and come back late Monday.

Me- Is it safe out there?

Z- of course. I would never bring u anywhere that isn't safe. I promise.

Me- Done.

Z- sweet!

Me- I better go, I’m fallin’ asleep.

Z- ok goodnight ily.

Me- Whatever.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sunday night, it's about eight thirty I guess, I’m not a hundred present sure though because I haven’t looked at my phone and I’m not in the car, that I 'borrowed' to get here a few hours ago. Yesterday, when I was talking to Zachary something hit me. Rule 2: In the event that one or the other has a boyfriend/in-like-with-a-boy, the other must share.

Since when do I forget the Rules? So that is why I am here. In one of the many cemeteries in this tiny town, sitting on this stone bench, in front of the only grave that matters to me. It’s solid black marble, with white letters, and delicate gold inlay forming beautiful curves and angles around the corners and sides of the headstone, three feet tall, three feet wide. The white roses I brought lay in front of the headstone, amazing fitting for the black stone. It reminds me of when she wore my pink dress; it made her stand out perfectly. Beautiful that word always fit her. I haven’t said anything yet; I can't seem to get my mouth to work, although I’ve always been able to talk in writing better than words. She knew that, she knew a lot about me.

"I can't believe I feel like I can't talk to you. It’s so weird not being able to see you all the time. Like the time we sat right beside each other, and then the guys moved us across the room from each other. Only now it's a thousand times worse. I feel like I can't function, but I know that I have to because you would kill me if I didn't try and I would do the same for you. It’s just, I don't know what it is, but I don't like it. I never have, and I never will. I hate it, not seeing you, not talking to you, not hearing your voice. I feel stupid, sitting here talking to an expensive rock, it's not like you can hear me, but I wish you could. I miss you, more than you’ll ever know.

"Well now to the whole reason I actually came. You remember Rule 2? Of course you do. Well, he's a new guy at school. He’s a couple years older than me. I think you would like him. I know I do. His name is Zachary. I’m going to the lake with him this weekend; I really just wish you could have known him. He’s weirdly sweet.

"Kayla why did you have to leave me? I’m so so so sorry I didn't go with you, it was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done, and I’ll never do that again, I just want you back! I just want you back!" I can't stop crying, and I don't care, not right now.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One more Monday gone by, well half gone anyway. I am waiting patiently for this fool. He said he was going to take me somewhere for some reason that he refused to tell me. I really don't know why I go along with these things. Although I have to say I like the going places part.

"Well well, what do we have here?"

"Hey Shannon." Watch this.

"You waiting on your ride?"

"Perhaps."

"Well he's not coming, I told him you said you couldn't stand him, and all his stupidity." Wow her laugh is annoying.

"Hey, really to go?" Right on time.

"Hey Zachary. I sure am."

"I told you not to get her, I told you-"

"And you also told every girl at school what you were going to do and your so called whispering was really loud. I got the whole thing multiple times." Really she's so dumb.

"And you also told the football team which told me at P.E." Nice one Zachary.

"You two are going to be soooo sorry for this!" Wow she even looks dumb, flipping her hair and strutting around the corner back inside.

"So where are we going?"

"Not telling."

"You know it didn't turn out very well last time you did this."

"But I know you better now."

"You don't know my past, and you don't know me as well as you think." Silence "Sorry, I shouldn't have said that."

 

"Here we are."

"The mall?"

"Come on. We have till nine and we need to buy enough stuff to redesign a bedroom."

"A bedroom?"

"It’s for the lake house. I’m a guy remember I suck at this kind of stuff."

"Alright, then we're going to Penny's."

"Okay."

"Who’s the room for?"

"Anyone who's there at the time."

"Okay, then neutral colors"

An hour and a half later we have bedding, pillows, a lamp, a mirror, a desk, desk chair, a dresser, and a little bedside table. All loaded in his truck, with plenty of room to spare.

"Now for the fun part." What?

"Which is?"

"You said it yourself you haven’t gone to the lake before, so you'll need a few things, and I don't want you missing anything, not if I can help it."

"Zachary you don't have to get me anything, I’ll be perfectly fine."

"Don’t give me that, you will accept anything I give you."

"But that doesn't mean I will let you buy me things."

"I’m not listening to anything you say. Now come on, we're going to look for stuff for you." Sigh.

 

Three hours later this boy has bought me WAY too much stuff.

"Zachary, do you even like shopping?"

"Only with you." Cheesy much?

"And why is that?"

"Because you know exactly what you do and don’t like. Everyone else tries everything on and then doesn't buy anything. It’s a complete waste of time."

"True, can we leave now?"

Zachary groaned but says, "I guess so. Come on let’s find the exit to this place."

 

"Zachary?"

"Yes."

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Driving me to the mall, buying all that stuff, believing I can change."

"And it's not going to end till you order me away."

"I did that a week ago, you still stuck around."

"You didn't know why I was handing around, and I couldn't let you give up on yourself like that."

"And thank you for that too."

"You’re welcome, love." To that I can only smile.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I’m walking home from a party, I’m alone, but it’s not far from home so I keep walking. I don’t notice how dark it is until I heard a low noise off to my right. It sounds like a dog’s growl, but I’m not sure. I look up to the sky trying to figure the time. I’ve lost my phone somewhere; I’ll have to find it latter. All of a sudden someone jumps from the bushes where the growl came from, and tackles me. I kick and claw and try to scream but an arm comes around me, so I bit it, hard. I hear a cry from behind me. I know this person, but I can’t place his voice. He stuffs something in my mouth and puts his hand over it so I can’t spit it out. Then he wraps his other arm around my waist, why am I so short all of a sudden? I hear him laugh and try to hit him again, but he tightens his grip and I have to stop fighting or he’ll suffocate me, so I relax. He sees that I’m giving up and allows me to breathe again. He laughs again, and starts to drag me into the bushes. He whispers in my ear, ‘Be a good girl and I won’t kill you.’ I know that voice, but who is it?!?! He puts his hands up my shirt…

And I bolt upright in my bed. That was the worst dream I’ve had in months. I look at my clock. Schist, I’m going to be late!

 

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Hu, oh nothing.”

“You’re a terrible liar.”

“Only when I can’t think straight.” For your information.

“Stop,” I stop walking, “tell me. What’s get you acting like this?”

“Like what?” I’m trying to be okay. Leave me alone for once.

“Like you’re a zombie.”

“Sorry. I just… I had a bad dream that’s all.”

“You have bad dreams every night, what makes this one different?”

“What it was about.” At least what I think it was about.

“It was about her wasn’t it?”

“Kind of,” sigh, saved by the bell, “I’ve got to go, see you later.”

 

Z- it’s later. Spill it.

Me- Spill what?

Z- u no what I’m talking about.

Me- Must I?

Z-only if u don’t what me 2 kidnap u.

Me- Fine. It was about her.

Z- I no that. I thought they all were?

Me- Most are. But…this was different.

Z- I got that, how?

Me- It don’t matter, just leave it be.

Z- NO, u were all off 2day. I’m not going to ‘leave it be’ I can’t.

Me- Please.

Z- Don’t do this 2 me.

Me- I need to think through it first.

Z- and then you’ll tell me?

Me- I’ll try to.

Z- ok, then I’ll wait.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“It’s Friday. You still going?” What kind of question is that?

“Of course, why wouldn’t I?” Aside from the dream.

“Just checking’. I’ll pick you up right after school.”

“Oh hang on, come in here a minute.” In here would be the random room no one uses and has nothing in it.

“What is it?” Here it goes.

“I’ve thought through it. It was about…the night she died.”

“Oh I’m-“

“Don’t interrupted, or I’ll never get it out. I dreamt of how she died, at least one why she might have died. But in the dream I was her. I didn’t get that until after I went home yesterday. I never thought of it happening like that, of her being-“

“Stop, this is hurting you more then it’s helping. I don’t want you to tell me anything that will hurt you. Besides, I got the picture. Come here.” Good Lord I love his hugs. They make me feel safe; I can’t tell you how long it’s been since I felt like that. “Come on, we’re going to be late for class.” Like I care.

“Okay.”

 

Wow I just realized, I’m leaving for some cabin on a lake that’s in the middle of nowhere with only one other person and he’s a guy. What have I gotten into? Maybe I have a death wish or something.

On the positive side my parents are ecstatic I’m not staying home this weekend so they didn’t even ask who I’m going with. *sigh* One tiny ray of sunshine in a sea of black skies and grey clouds. There seem to be a lot more rays of sunshine then I previously thought. What’s that noise? Oh, he’s here, perfect timing, as always.

“Hey, ready to go?” That was a dumb question. Rule 5: Reframe from asking dumb questions.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

“You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

“Well, I can’t very well stay home; I’ll be bugged all year about it if I don’t. And of course I want to go. Why wouldn’t I?”

“I don’t know, I just wanted to make sure you were still okay with going.”

“Let’s go already.”

“Alright alright, right this way, my lady.”

“What?” Did he really just call me that?

“Well you don’t like ‘Princess’, and I can’t call you ‘tops’ or you’ll hit me with a bat, so what else is there to call you?”

“One.”

“One, one what?”

“Warning one, you get three until I hit you with a bat. I told you never to say that name.”

“Oh, sorry. You know I really need to learn all the things I can’t do, or say around you, so I don’t end up getting hurt.”

“You already know the things that can get you hurt. No one can learn all the things that remind me of her, or the things we used to say or do. I’ve gotten use to everyone doing some things, like have silent conversations, or giving each other that face that says, ‘I so know what you’re thinking.’ They don’t bother me as much as they use to. But I still can’t do them, I’ve tried. I just end up crying.”

“Well, we have a long drive ahead of us, and talking about this is depressing- for both of us- so let’s think of something else to talk about.”

“Like what?”

“Like, are you joining the team again?”

“Twenty questions then. I don’t know yet, I’ve been thinking about it. What’s your dad like?”

“Twenty questions it is. He’s a total nut, loves the forest and all its inhabitance, hates big cities and anything made from trees or dead animals. He even torched my mom’s makeup and told her she couldn’t wear it if it was made from animals. Do you know what ‘inhabitance’ means?”

“Yes, dear I know what ‘inhabitance’ means, I’m not two. You talk about your dad a good bit, what about your mom?”

“Well, she’s not around all that much anymore. They never told me what about, but they had a hug argument one day when I was ten, I remember them yelling, and the next day she moved out. She still visits, and I can go see her whenever I want to. I’m the one thing they can agree on. But she’s nice, if that’s what you want to know. She works for a company in Atlanta, something to do with the airport; it’s kinda cool because I get half price tickets to wherever I want. She owns a big log house in the mountains too. That’s where I go to visit her. And she loves to buy me stuff, I guess because she can’t see me most of the time, but I wish she would at least tell me when she sent things. Like one time, she bought me a pool and mailed it to my house. The next day after school I came home to a fire truck, two police officers, and my dad running around trying to get them off the grass. It was so funny, but after my dad called mom, he looked at me like it was my fault for the next two weeks. Which is how long it took for the grass to look normal again. What about your parents?”

“Back up, she mailed you a pool?”

“Yes, she can do some odd things sometime. Oh, she also paid for the cops to make sure it got to my house in one piece and for the firemen to fill it with water. Now answer my question.”

“Okay, okay, and you answered my question so you can ask me another one after this. Okay, my parents, well, what can I say? I haven’t seen much of them in a while, they mostly just leave me be, and I do the same with them. As far as I know, my mom’s a teacher at the middle school, and my dad’s a photographer, he travels a lot, he’s never home for more than two days at a time. Mom goes into work at five and comes home at six except on Fridays, and then she comes in at eight.”

“A teacher and a photographer, who would have thunk it?”

“My parents.” 

“That wasn’t my question.”

“Then you shouldn’t have asked it. What time is it?”

“About nine twenty. Getting tired?”

“My eyes say yes.”

“Here,” he pulls a little blanket and pillow out from behind him, “take a nap, I’ll wake you when we stop.”

“Are you sure?” I don’t want him thinking he’s boring, because he’s not.

“I’m positive.”

“Okay.”

“Sweet dreams, My Lady.” I smile at his old fashioned name for me, and drift off to sleep. Surly my dream will be sweet, with the perfect company, what could go wrong?

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wow that was a good nap.

Wow that's a beautiful cabin.

Wow that boy is gorgeous.

Wait, is that? It is! It's Zachary!

Man, I have got to wake up; I think I’m seeing things.

"Hey, you’re awake."

"Not really." I smile at him as he helps me out of the truck, "Why didn't you wake me?"

"You looked to peaceful." He's smiling at me.

"I take it this is it?" I ask while looking around.

There’s the cabin, the door is navy blue but beside that it looks just like a typical wood on wood cabin, there's a dock, and a boat ramp by a huge tree with a rope swing on it, and another rope for swing into the water, and there's a small boat house not far from the ramp. Overall, a perfect mix of teen hang out and romantic getaway.

"Yeah, this is it. It looks a lot better now than what I did before."

"Was it really that bad?"

"Between the exploding bathroom, and the toxic trash all over the yard, defiantly!" I laugh as I picture an old rundown heap of wood covered in bathroom water and huge gas clouds coming off piles of trash all over the place. "Want to go in?"

"Yeah, let me get my bag."

"Oh no you don't." He grabs my arm, and pulls me back to him, then picks me up-bridal style- carrying me inside.

"What are you doing?" I yell at him, “Put. Me. Down.”

"Your stuff is inside and it wouldn't matter, you are to do no work whatsoever, got it?"

"Why not?"

He smiles before answering, "Because this is your much needed vacation from everything, and I will not allow you to work in any way. If you work, you'll ruin the vacation."

"A vacation always involves work. Haven’t you ever gone anywhere?"

"Yes, and that's why I brought you here. Because you know very little of anything about the stuff out here, and I know all about it. So I will be doing all the work, and you will do nothing that I would consider 'work'."

Sighing in frustration I think of some way to win the argument, "Well in that case, you’re making me work right now, if I let go of you, I’ll fall."

"I would never allow that to happen, now here's the couch," He places me on the couch and sits down beside me, "I’ll show you the rest of the cabin latter, but for now. I need a nap from all that driving."

He places his head on my lap like a little kid and soon falls asleep, I have to smile at him. Shaking my head I look up. There's a flat screen above a huge fireplace, and above that is a weird clock with a square face and crooked hands, it takes me a while but I figure it's about six twenty in the morning.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s about six p.m. now, and he’s finally awake.

“What are you doing?” Isn’t it obvious?

“Cooking and I’m done now so don’t even try stopping me. Here,” I hand him a plate, “you should eat something.” He sighs, making me laugh. “So what should we do know that you’re up?”

“I want to show you around, so you don’t get lost.”

“And how am I going to do that?”

He smiles at me, “It’s just a precaution.”

“Well hurry up then. It’ll be dark soon.”

 

Dear…I hate diaries so what am I going to call this thing?

Dear temporary-daily thingy,

First official day of ‘vacation’.

Zachary took me on a walk around the property. This place is huge, and beautiful, and so isolated!  
If he wasn’t with me, I might actually be afraid; it’s that in-the-middle-of-nowhere.

Oh, get this, okay so it was really dark by the time we were coming back about two hours ago, and he decides to tell me about an old church in the hills about a mile into the forest, and the ghost that wonders in the trees and AROUND THE LAKE!

He had to tell me that, in the dark, near the trees, and then he ran his fingertips down my back! BOYS!

Correction: THAT BOY!!!!

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s so pretty out here. We're on a little boat out on the lake. You can see the mountains towering about the cabin, the peaceful forest, the cabin itself looking as if it's been there for hundreds of years. Beautiful...

"Hey." What?

"What is it?"

"You spaced out again. Is everything alright?"

"Everything's perfect. So what are we doing after this?"

"What are you bored already?"

"No, it's too nice to be boring out here, but I’m pretty sure we'll start to fry sooner or later."

"Haha, yeah. I don't know, maybe we could walk around the lake?"

"Hmmm, that sounds nice." I’m so smiling right now.

 

It’s dark as we head back to the cabin, the shadows closing in on me-us, I meant us. Night hasn't been my friend for a while now, although I used to love the darkness all around, now it just brings dreams, or rather nightmares.

The last of the sun's rays disappears as the night grows colder and much much darker, in a very short amount of time.

I feel Zachary's hand on my arm, and look over at him, "Are you ok?"

I look down, noticing that I’m almost clinging to him, but I don't let go, "Sorry, the night isn't usually a good time for me."

"Hey," He lifts my head with his other hand, "it's ok, nothing’s going to hurt you, not even your memories, ok?"

I simply nod.

Once inside Zachary takes my hand and pulls me into his lap as he sits down on the couch, "What is it?"

"Your dreams."

"Yes?" What could he possibly want to know about them that I haven’t already told him?

"I noticed something, on the way here; you didn't have any did you?"

"No."

"Well, I think it's because you weren't alone."

"I guess."

"I don't want you to have any more nightmares. So I was thinking that maybe, maybe we should sleep together."

"WHAT?" OUCH, the floor hurts! Yes, I just fell backward like a lame movie.

"No, not like that. I promise I won't touch you. I just, I want you to be able to sleep that's all."

"Zachary, we're already sleeping in the same room. Help me up?" Because the floor is cold and my side hurts from landing on it.

"I know but you don't have them when someone-"

"You." I interrupt him.

"What?"

"It’s you, if I’m with you they stay away."

"Then?"

"Fine, but tell me when you do something." Step 1 stick finger in face-complete.

"I promise." Step 2 get promise-complete.

"Good, I’ll go change." Step 3 walk away-in progress. Why am I making steps? I amuse myself sometimes.

 

Why does it not feel weird that his so close to me, his head just a foot from mine? Why is it this simple boy can calm me to the point that those nightmares go away? The dreams that have haunted me for months, the dreams that wake me at two in the morning screaming, and gasping for air. The dreams that always get worse. The dreams I’ve almost killed myself over.

It takes some time but I unwrap myself from the covers without waking him and creep outside, it’s cold but not freezing. The moon is out in full, it's shining off the lake, making it look more like twilight then midnight. Why did I come out here? Easy, I need to think. I know I’ll regret it later, but I have to think of her. It’s getting better, sort of.

There’s more color in the world, there's a little less static, it's getting clearer. I can see her face, her smile, hear her voice, see her talking to me, as if she were standing in front of me.

"Allison." What? Where am I? Oh schist, Rule 14: Notice Details, like the fact I didn't even watch where I was walking, where am I?

"Allison."

"Who's there?" And how do you know my name? "Hello?" Why is it so foggy?

"Allison, hide."

"What? Why? Who are you?" Totally freaking out now. I can't see a thing, and that voice. I know that voice.

"Hide!" yelp, who just pushed me? Or what, I didn't even see it!

The ground is wet, soggy, it's gross. Wait, why is it dirt not grass?

Someone/thing has been digging here, but why?

Where are the trees? There aren't any. Okay that's just weird. I’m not near the cabin, I’m not near the lake, I have to be in the forest, but there are no trees here.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I remember when I loved the night, I remember sneaking outside my window to walk around the yard, I remember thinking that she would never do that. Now all I see is darkness, shadows moving around me, I can’t tell what they are, trees, people, or animals, I don’t know. The night paralyzes me.

That voice, I know it, I think I do anyway. I scurry back trying to hide, to make who or whatever it is happy, and to make myself invisible. I hit something hard and turn to see where I’m going, it’s a headstone. I’m in a grave yard, and there’s something in the distance, it looks like an old building of some kind.

What a second, that story Zachary told me. It’s the old church he was talking about! Then that thing, was a ghost? I didn’t think they could touch you. I didn’t think ghosts existed, sure there are demons but not ghosts, are there? No, there can’t be, so that thing was a demon? Oh great, now I’m ever more scared, good thinking Allison.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Where am I? I look around hoping to see something I recognize. I can’t hear anything.

Wait, I see someone by the tree. It's a girl, puffy hair, short. She looks familiar, really familiar. It can't be.

"K-Kayla? Kayla is that you?" It can't be, she died. My minds playing tricks on me, I should have known this would happen. I find a way to be happy, then I destroy it, I don't deserve to be happy. I killed the one person I loved; I should never have come out here. This was a mistake, I'm going insane.

“Kayla I'm so sorry, I'm sorry...”

 

"Allison!" Zachary? Why is he out here? The sun's up?

"Allison! What are you doing out here? Allison?" I can't answer. I can't even think. He helps me up and leads me through the woods back to the cabin.

"What happened out there?"

Zachary spends the rest of the day trying to get me to talk. Late that night we’re watching T.V.

I look at him and say, "I saw her."

He looks at me stunned for a moment.

"I know she's dead. I saw her buried. I put a gem tree from Rock City in her hands just before she was put in the ground. But I saw her. She was there, in the cemetery. She called  
my name. She was standing by a tree, and all I could do was tell myself I was losing it."

"Allison..."

 

The end  
 

In Memory of Allison Smith and Kayla Sanders  
The Best of Friends even in Death

By Zachary Miller


End file.
